This forum and a couple others I see the same thing. This one tends to be the worst. How many partners are open/out to your significant other. Specifically married couples. Can someone explain the thought process behind running around behind your spouse's back? I would truly like to know the TRUTH of why you can't tell your significant other your sexual desires? Are you afraid of what they'll think? Say? Do? Who they will tell? I'm very interested in reading these stories.


My wife knows my deepest, darkest secrets and desires..all of them..and our marriage is rock solid and I truly think that's helped tremendously. She tells me she loves how open we are and we know what it takes to make each other happy and feel good. Last night we actually had a sexting session, never have we ever done that. But on both sides we included a bi guy, fulfilling her desires and mine, orgasms on both ends were amazing. I just love being open with her. Next weekend we made a deal for me to see how far I can go with my barber, the signs show he's closet bi. But I'm excited about it.

 

I am widowed and don’t have anyone that serious. Probably issues with the relationship in the first place. It is hard to leave your relationship when you are comfortable. Sometimes there is no place else to go

 

I once told about my sexual past and my partner called me disgusting and we never had sex again. Trust is what matters and if it is not there it does not matter. Honesty above all else, unless your considered disgusting, then fuck saying anything.

 

I don't think we've ever deliberately withheld things from each other.

 

My wife & I know all about each other past, we were both whores. now she wants an open relationship, she wants a fuck buddy that says we can share since I am bi

 

If you're married and thinking of an open relationship, then get marriage counseling first. It's still infidelity. All open relationship is doing is masking relationships issues.

 

I'm open, within reason. I didn't come here to hide. My av is me and anyone of my family or friends can see anything I post on line.

When I learn something told in confidence, I don't share that with anyone. That's not open, it's duplicitous.

 

Oh yes. My bf is the best guy I was ever with and don’t want to ruin it over any side action

 

I let my husband know when I feel the need and we go out and find a guy..or I call a friendly regular

 

When I was young and exploring myself, I found there connection between my dick and my as

 

Shit me n my wife know all about each other we only fool around with others when we r together never alone

 

That was supposed to be dick and ass thing stopped me. Basically the people I shared this with judged me that's okay I guess. People trying to hook me up with guys I thought about it as often as I had to people day secure in my own sexuality. I told people I about the most secure motherfucker I know. I said if I wanted to fuck guys I would. I had opportunity to be with guys and it be secret. Maybe I should have told the childhood masterbation ritual I had going on. Telling anyone this didn't really do me any favors. I have given myself the most and the best orgasms. I don't want fucked in the ass. Not my fault what works the best for me is dick shaped. There are reasons why people hide. I admitted something that feels good to me and some people around can't put the connection together after all these years to try and make people think I am something I am not. That's dedication. Maybe that is why I am here nobody else believed. If he will put a fake dick in, he will take a real one.

 

In an ideal world you would be open and honest with your partner without fear. In an ideal world you would be open and honest with your family, friends too. Sadly that is not how it seems to work.

Fear, prejudice, jealousy I don't rightly know. I do know that telling my BF how many sexual partners I had shouldn't have made him behave as he did. I can tell you that not all guys are comfortable with their GF being bi sexual and I had a BF who asked if I had anal sex. Apparently his desire to have anal sex with me was not as strong as the feelings he had when I revealed that he wasn't going to be the first guy in my ass. I mean he wasn't the first guy in my pussy either and so I really didn't see it would be the issue it turned out to be.

So I spent a long time being very careful about admitting my sexual past, my bi sexuality and even some of my kinks because the outrage, the heartbreak, the tantrums somehow didn't seem worth it.

 

Despite having a rocky start on our marriage consisting of allowed trespasses and mistresses throughout periods in the first 10 years. My wife is fully aware of most of my lovers not so much by name, but of their presence and that was by design. Strangely it's made the next 25 years worth fighting for to where we are as a couple and has built a stable trust!

 

I'm glad you found your way through the struggles to be here with us, we're better off for having you.

 

My wife and I are opend mind, but (it's always a but) we are comited to each other.
The first rule was, no lies, no screwing around, no sex with other people.
We do a lot of things, kinky, pervers, we talk about our needs, desires, etc... We have a good sex life.
The problem is that in the last time I started to have some bisexual fantasys... Crap! I wanted to suck cock! Simple as that.
I couldn't tell her, not because of the gay thing, because that I don't think is the problem, because of no making sex with other people rule.
I did it two times, one in my car with a guy from a bar and one in a bars toilet to two guys who wanted to pick some chicks...
They were horny as hell, they did not have luck with the girls, so after a few drinks and jokes, I was the girl.
But this toilet bar sex is not for me, I am 42, and this feeling that I cheat my wife, is fucking bad.
Saying her, I don't know. Doing it sometimes, because I don't have this desire every day... Only sometimes... I don't know...
I know that I want to live my life and I did not had the opportunity to live it in the past... (life mistakes)...
Ehh, that's it. Maybe you have some advice for me. Thanks a lot!

 

Yes and no. I'm allowed to have female partners.

 

What if your wife said, "Do what you need to do, but I don't want to hear about it?" I feel like the OP is being a bit judging and doesn't understand that no two relationships are the same.
There are reasons you may not understand, just like others can't understand an open relationship.

 

I'm happy your relationship is so rock solid. Everyone would love to have that. Not every relationship is the same. I myself, have seen how others situations has been and i have had experience in long relationships and marriage myself. The dynamics in each one vary. We all strive for a healthy relationship. The fact is not every relationship has safe, compassionate spaces to feel you can just be totally open.

I have no idea how long you've been married. But if you haven't been married a very lengthy time. Then maybe you wouldn't understand that most relationships can sometimes be unpredictable as ocean waves or desert storms. They can be peaceful, calm and nearly perfect or rocky, almost frighteningly uncontrollable. I have learned a great deal about not judging what takes place in ones relationship or marriage. You never know what all they have endured. You never know if they are fighting to stay in love or scared to admit they aren't in love. Maybe they don't even know. They just know they are trying like hell to make things work. Maybe they have stepped out for reasons that noone would understand. Then again maybe they haven't. Yet, they long for things they've lost or can't seem to find within their relationship. I've seen people try open relationships for whatever reason. Some are successful and some fail.

My point is that there isn't some guide book or list to go by. Nothing is black and white when it comes to relationships.

 

It’s hard to define my husband and my relationship. The easiest way to describe it is that we have a great communication with our sexual desires. Being open and up front with these desires has opened a lot of doors for us that most monogamous couples miss.