President Donald Trump announced Wednesday a sweeping ban on transgender people serving in the military, a controversial policy reversal that intersects with the advocacy of transgender teen and activist Jazz Jennings on Wednesday’s episode of I Am Jazz.
In the latest installment of the TLC series, 16-year-old Jennings attends an event for the 17th annual Transgender Day of Remembrance — a day when supporters come together to reflect on every member who has met their death due to anti-transgender hatred.
At the event, Jennings, her parents and the attendees witness Shawn, a U.S. veteran, share about how guilt and shame associated with being transgender drove her to join the armed forces.
“I was 7 years old when they were trying to get me to play basketball and football and speaking to me in a tone that I didn’t understand, but I could understand when they spoke to my sisters. I knew I was different,” Shawn says through tears.
“I decided I had to try everything manly possible and I joined the Army at 17,” Shawn shares of her reasoning for joining the army. “On a leave I went into a drag bar and a young entertainer came to me and said, ‘Where’d you get those cheekbones from? Girls will kill for those cheekbones.’ ”
While sharing her story, Shawn struggles to speak as she admits the daily shame and embarrassment she feels in relation to her identity journey.
“I wake up every morning ashamed,” she tearfully says. “I wake up every morning guilty. Embarrassment is the worst feeling and does more damage than hate does.”
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At the event, Jennings also speaks in support of members of the trans community.
“This is a special community that has suffered through the worst possible discrimination,” Jazz says in her speech. “As we remember those we’ve lost, I want to focus on the brave, strong and honorable ways they lived out their true selves.”
WATCH: President Trump: Transgender People Can’t Serve in U.S. Military in ‘Any Capacity’
Trump’s much-maligned ban is a sharp reversal not only of many of his own previous stances but also of an Obama Administration policy to allow transgender service members to serve openly.
The president’s statement, made on Twitter Wednesday, claimed transgender service members — who were only permitted to serve openly a year ago — burden the military with “tremendous medical costs” and “disruption.”
“After consultation with my Generals and military experts, please be advised that the United States Government will not accept or allow Transgender individuals to serve in any capacity in the U.S. Military,” he wrote.
“Our military must be focused on decisive and overwhelming victory and cannot be burdened with the tremendous medical costs and disruption that transgender in the military would entail,” Trump continued. “Thank you.”
A 2016 study by the RAND Corporation estimates there are up to 6,630 active duty transgender service members. It also determined that the cost of extending gender reassignment benefits to services members would cost the Pentagon between $2.4 million and $8.4 million a year — a tiny fraction of the military healthcare budget.
I Am Jazz airs Wednesdays (9 p.m. ET) on TLC.